There are so many nuances to this separation.. it never feils to stop me in my tracks as I truly make a holehearted effort here to move on and get on with my life. Walking home tonight I had a realization. I have noone to love any longer?
Yes yes, there are mums and pets and God and friends and and... But my love is no
longer wanted. My man has left me hung and dry. And my love is not returned any longer. He's no longer in love with me. He does not want me. And I am now alone again. Different this time. I like being alone. But this was not vulentary loneliness. This was not the life I had in my mind and heart at all.
And when I move I will wake up alone. And one day I will meet him holding his new girl. And there is absolutely nothing I can do about any of it. Can this really be true? Is there absolutely nothing I can do?
(Besides torturing myself with these no-brainer questions, that I in vain pretend have an "out of the box" solution to it, when in fact I'm just dilutional..)
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