Too many beers in the sun..

No no no. I have done it AGAIN.
As sure as the Brits will get a sunburn, I have been dizzying round outside with too little clothes on. Yes, the sun is out, but that does not mean flip-flops. Soaking up sun, very nice, but I could feel a chill, couldn't I? The fact how cold it really was, muted by the many beers, most probably.
Seem to recall the dog shivering and whimpering towards the end of the evening, snuggling my beach bag for some snippet of warmth. What idiot goes out in a t-shirt in April. Anyway, my stupidity was handsomely rewarded with a 1 week stunt in bed with a copiously persistent and draining flu.
At least it's me who's sick. I don't get mansick...

Beer tastes better in the sun!

Phew! It's another winter survived. Exercise is fun again, and people look up rather than down walking down the street. Even dogs have a new swag in their trot, and beer just tastes that much better sipped in loving spring sunshine.
The girls seem prettier with their freshly shaved legs and fake tan streaks.All of a sudden men everywhere are panic-jogging, to get a sixpack before hitting the beach.. (giggle giggle, good luck with that guys)
Bye bye weight-gain and greasy comfort-food, welcome swimming and crispy salads!
Bye bye depression and nasty colds, hello velvety evenings in cotton dresses!

Spring fever!

My apologies to those living in Nordic conditions still. Here we are in the bud of spring. My dog has already tested the ocean. Sun and fresh wind, not freezing cold wind, coffee on the balcony with a blanket kind of weather. It's ACE!
I am naturally prone to brooding during the winter-months, and just when I feel like caving in, ta ta ta taa, there's the sun.
The ocean is blue and turqoise again, not black and angry.
Birds chirp and I've got a light sprinkle of freckles..
Finally! I can't wait for the year's first swim.

De-clutter: NOW

Some people have no clutter. Yes, they have loads of stuff, but it's all organised and neat, de-earning it the status of "clutter" and re-earning the label "functional living."
"This hamper is wonderful", my friend told me, "It's got one pocket for bills, one for personal mail, and one for crap we will throw away". The hamper/wall-ornament with little blue and white fluffy clouds printed on ( a result of my friends passion for arts and craft, hangs right inside the entrance door. "So, when we get in, we just sort it out then and there! Neat, huh?" she smiles.
I imaging what it looks like when I come home after a 11 hr. job at the office.
Bang! The wall shows how I fight my way through the door 1,5 meter broad with shopping, the mail clutched in my teeth, a laptop worth it's weight in lead, overcoat, umbrella, files and work-related paperwork..e.t.c.
My shoes kicked off in each direction, usually later found between the hallway and kitchen. I usually throw my coat on the kitchen table or chairs, bag on the kitchen counter, keys in the always empty fruit-bowl and I put away the fridge/freezer first before I force my partner to put aside the rest while I have a rest with my feet up.
Yes, we have tried to make systems to where what goes. It works as a repellent on me. If there's a bowl for coins, I'll drop them in the vase next to it. If there's a shoe-rack, mine goes off in the kitchen.
No hamper will change clutter in my home, I'm afraid.
Currently pondering a different solution.

TV, endless source of negotiation

As a working (and somewhat bone idle) couple, the evening is spent snuggled on the couch with our dinners, watching TV.
There's the remote control issue to start off with. When he has the remote, he drives me insane flicking trough channels at solar speed, where all I get is a headache. How he can absorb the picture and make a decision on the eligibility of the program in a split second of a blurred flash of the picture, where I cant even make out if it's a program, commercials or in color or black & white is a riddle to this day.. But, hey, I get to flick most of the time.
There are programs that are so girlish that any man would rather wear lace panties before admitting to have seen a full episode of "Who's wedding is it anyway", "Tyra Banks show", "Yummy Mummy", "Charmed", "Celebrity Makeover" or "Women on men", so best just let it go.
Then again there are programs men love, even if they are both educational and "current", us girls just can't muster up the enthusiasm to last through a full episode. You have those hi-tech "futuristic/scientific" specials we know and love, such as "Mega structures", "Uncovered: Life on Mars", "Physics of Athletics" and the "History/Myth-Busting"- category such as "The Third Reich:5 hrs. behind-the-senes special", "Djenghis Khan: War Strategy" or the "Adventure/Wildlife" category with goodies such as "Worlds most dangerous Predators", " Whitewater rafting: Alaska gone wild!" or " Reptiles in the outback".
So, what can we agree on.
Thanks to whatever good forces was with me, but my man is blessed with an almost complete lack of interest in the no.1 enemy of female TV-viewing: Sports. That's right, no.sports.necessary.
We both enjoy a good comedy, and we can agree on several.
We like Malcom in the middle, coupling, Scrubs, Two and a half men, king of Queens, Fraiser, The Office (Brit version, please!), How I met your mother, Rules of engagement e.t.c.
He can endure an occasional Sex and the City or Lipstick Jungle, and I'm compromising to see NYPD Blue or CSI.
All in all we both agree on two things as far as the TV is concerned:
1: What's up with all those commercials!
2: What's up with those constant re-runs?!

We canceled christmas, and I liked it!

Yes. It's true. Not a single Christmas-ordeal (besides all the Gluhwein I made..erhmm). No tree, no gifts, no family to visit or come over.
We spent the 24th with "Twilight" (what's the big deal with that film, anyway?) and Burger-King. The 25th we took the dog for a swim and workout (we watched), and saw the new James Bond with Chinese Take-Away. Ace!
I've had long baths and red wine. We have given and received massages. We have laughed at how lucky we are to escape our families. Don't get me wrong, it's with love, but just us, on our own, in bathrobes... we have to be allowed a sigh of relief.
Once before I had a Christmas on my own. When I was 23, and couldn't
afford to fly home.

We have thought seriously about dropping New-Years Eve as well..
Every year we go to a hyped-up party with wind-up friends, ready to make this :
"A NIGHT TO REMEMBER!" Yeah, right... The last I can remember New-Years Eve parties were always a disappointment.
We could order a Indian...

Minibar in the bedroom

If there is one thing you should have in your bedroom besides a decent mattress, a sexy man and a decent "toy", if you catch my drift, it's a hotel-style fridge. A minibar. I've had one for a while now, and I am ecstatic about it.
For busy ladies it's the cats whiskers.
First off all it keeps bottled water handy and available.
Once a month, when the chocolate monster appears, I have chilled choc right there.
We keep a little baby-campaign there as well, for those nights when we feel particularly raunchy.
But perhaps the best is it's additional benefits. I have my all my creams and gels in there. Trust me, the only thing that works better than sex to freshen you up and make you look dewy, it's nicely chilled creams, especially eye-cream.
Nail varnish lasts longer and dries quicker when chilled as well.
Living in Malta, where it is sickenly hot in summertime, I have my fresh nylons in the fridge overnight. Bliss when stepping into a boiling car. Sure, the effect does not last long, but it's lush for a bit.
I also keep my cooling eye-mask there, where I remember it! It used to hide behind the cheese and mustard before, and I hardly ever used it.
Ladies, if you don't have one, get one. You're worth it!

Those new-year's resolutions...

So, I can be a new woman,- AGAIN.
I can each year you see, but I never get round to it. We all have broken new-year's resolutions in common. Personally I stopped announcing them many years ago.
No need to face the public embarrassment of broken resolutions 2 week into January.
Every year I announce to all my friends that " My only new-year's resolution this year, is not to have any". Very clever, right.
Inside I'll always have my secret private resolutions, though.
Will this be the year I finally manage to quit smoking? Being a smoker nowadays is a public humiliation.
Can I fit into a size 10 this year?
Will I ever be in control of my personal cash-flow?
All the same pressures of new-years resolutions I endure in quiet defeat.
But, as my friend and an absolute cynic, pointed out:
"Girl, will you chill out on the January- or- complete- failure nonsense, there's a brand new Monday every week!"
Seems I can feel guilty year-round, fuzzing over January alone does not suffice.
I'll have some Gluhwein and a few cookies now, I think.

Tanning hysteria

Sunset Tan
It's been a few years now. Slowly building a crescendo which has shown it's orange peak the last year or so. Girls in the offices I visit, in December, have spray-tans. All actresses spray-tan, such as Charlize Theorn (who's usually top glam) and singers, Christina Aguilera looks luminous at times. The "reality-brain-insult" show "Sunset Tan" shows us all aspects of how the magic is done.
A quick google search shows : Keyword: fake tan : 2,860,000 hits
We started off with the gory self-tanner cream. Today you can have your pick. Cream, lotion, foam, spray.. it's all there for that sun-kissed look.
We need a pick-me-up every now and again, and the shocking image of one's own milky/winter body is too much to bear,- fake tan is good. Most of us like to use it as a great holiday preparation, and to maintain that hard-earned holiday glow.
But some women I know have now adopted it as a staple in their daily regime.
It's tan all-year round. Nothing else is acceptable for a well-groomed lady of 2008.
Come new-year soon, I wish we'll see an end to spray-tan hysteria.