Jealousy

What is this horrible thing? I mean, really! What is jealousy? It seems the number 1 killer of all things good between man and woman. Sometimes it is just a small ghost of the past lingering, sometimes it is an elephant in the room, sometimes its fact sometimes its fiction.. whatever it is, its toxic. Adultery never happens under your nose. And it is not what happens on a boys/girls's night out. Its a planned and pepped matter. Sure, there will be many cases of drunken stupidity as well, but that's not deliberate cheating. However real adultery is ongoing. It requires effort and planning. If the partner is jealous or not its still going to happen if the will to do it is there. What I mean is jealousy is not a preventive measure, its just futile. It creates distance. It achieves nada. What will be will be regardless. Anyone in a committed relationship know the rules. Know what they are gambling with. Know the stakes. If they are willing to loose the stake, is calling, checking, arguing, spying etc really worth it? For what? You can't predict the inevitable. But you can go about your life telling yourself you are special. And if the person you love wants someone else, the truth will see light one day anyway, so why create negativity trying to prove something that may or may not be true? Either way.. we can't force anybody to love us. Is the checking of email, cellphone, pockets, skype,general spying and inquisitions really serving a purpose? What's really going to come out of it? We don't own each other. Ever. We can only have hope and faith in eachother, and live one day at a time.

Downward Facing Dog

You thought I would be doing a post on yoga, didn't you?
Unfortunately, not at all.
In fact yoga and me would not match at all right now. Yoga and me are opposites!
Saturday last weekend I bent over some washing and CLICK, my lower back just locked.
In Norwegian its called "Hekseskudd", in German it's called "Hexenschuss".. in English.. ah well..Lumbago.. It is crippling. Those of you who have experienced it will know!
Needless to say, it is not just painful it is also a massive handicap and quite humiliating. Imagine your back locking as you pick sth off the floor, and you cant stand up.. For 4 days!! This I have had once or twice a year since my early 20ies, so I'm a junior expert in my own humble opinion.
I cant get dressed. Cant shower, Cant feed the animals, Take out the trash, Go to the shops .. NOTHING.
And the summer seems so inviting.

I'm reduced to a stage where there are two enchanting options, both involving a 30 minute pierce-fully painful, dreadful, cold-sweating, nauseating BATTLE to get from a to B.

Option A: Lie down on hard surface (floor)
Option B: Once the the stars and moons from your 30 min battle to get up, you can-
stand up straight! Yey. Can you walk?: NO Can you bend down?: NO Can you climb stairs?: NO Can you go to the bathroom? : Come on now.. use your imagination...

I rarely ponder the use of hard drugs, however, if Pete Doherty called today, I would not be interested in his guitar, that's for sure.
But, this too shall pass..

Anyway.. For those who have experienced this I can discourage those of you who haven't by sharing this fact: According to reliable statistics, 4 out of 5 people will experience lower back (waist) pain or as known as lumbago.

What helps:
- Avoid soft beds and deep armchairs ( that's when you need a crane to get out again)
Ergo: sleep/rest on hard surface.
- Heat: Hot water bottles or my favourite, the microwavable bean-bags gives great relief. I tie it up with a scarf, looking like a failed and distorted Geisha
- Magnesium: Magnesium is a natural muscle re laxer. I always have magnesium tablets around. Also works for headaches, stiff shoulders and period cramps folks!
- Stand up and walk around: The trapped nerve and or muscle need blood. All you want is to lie in a comfortable position and make it go away. It won't unless you move.
- Lower Back transplant: let's just leave that to the yanks, shall we?

Save the world from

I am feeling particularly moody today. No wonder, today is full moon.. Anyhow, I do enjoy a good moan. Below please find some current pet-hates of mine.



PLEASE RELIEVE ME FROM SEEING OR HEARING ABOUT:

1: Justin Bieber: He is, where to begin, ehhh, uff, just so ... ahrg.. incredibly annoying

2: Hello Kitty. When is this gruesome trend gonna fade? I mean. Grown women .. .

3: Libya: "Its in the name of democracy and human rights" Duh...

4: TV reruns: Its a complete piss-take. What am I paying for exactly?

5: Eurovision: Spare me. Its a complete circus. I cant even watch it for the kitch-factor anymore.

6: Whitney Huston: For the love of God. Go through this rehab and stay away! Relax and take care of yourself and your daughter. it is good for you. No more desperate come-backs, please.

7: Low-Carb diets: YES YES, I know they work. But it's the toughest diet ever!

8: Eye- Cream: Damn you all! Be it Dior, Dermologica,Kanebo, Bodyshop or Nivea. I still have bags and dark circles.

9: Dish-washing: A deep hollow cry! Why, but why, don't I have a dishwasher? And when I do it's still the thing I hate the most of all chores..

10: TIE: US and EU. Why can't we all just get a grip? Or at least stop acting as if we haven't got to?

My new co-worker

Lady Gaga makes me GaGa

So.. Am I the only one who things Lady GaGa is a great talent and musician of calibre, but think the styling is getting out of hand. I mean, she has Madonna for breakfast for sure. I just don't get all the hype. She looks like a tranny, and it's getting old.
It started with outlandish outfits. It caught everyone's attention. This is cool. Now she has gone from outlandish outfits, to be carried in a wagon shaped like a giant dinosaur-egg by gay-looking hunks. Lately however, she is in her underwear phase. Yes, you are thin and hot. You too are sexy. As much as you can! You will never be Rhianna or Beyonce! Sorry GaGa. Now please get back to your outlandish outfits and music!

Everyday treasures

Freshly squeezed orange juice (no..not from bottle..u must do it yourself! Oranges straight from the fridge)
A good cry triggered by beautiful music or a moving film/play/opera
An oral orgasm by a selfless and appreciating man
Coming inside from freezing wind and rain to a cozy warm house
Ice cold beer with good company
The perfect lasagna (sometimes you get so disappointed)
Fitting in to a pair of old jeans
Call from an old friend you have not spoken to in ages but never forgot
The dog walking perfect on the lead

What is your everyday treasures?

Good things about being over 30

The ability to say "no" to people. Life is too short to say yes to do things you dont want to do and things you don't have to do.

The benefit of knowing your body and your likes and dislikes in bed. Added bonus is the confidence to let your man know these things..

Most of us have mastered at least a few "signature dishes", which can be served without embarrassment and or food poisoning.

Rowing with parents have stopped, and one begins to actually enjoy their company.

A good night out does not have to include hysterical nightclubs, a drug/booze haze and meaningless one night stands.

You can reread some of the books you read in your teens, and actually understand them this time.

Home office

Working from home has its pros and cons. Right now I am enjoying the pros. I get up. Put on my cuddly comfy fleece and pyjama pants, walk downstairs to log on the PC and put on the kettle. I feed the animals and do some stretching exercises. Coffee and checking in box is followed by lighting candles in the kitchen which is now my domain for culinary experiments (made cod with pearl barley the other day!?) and office.
Am I snacking too much? Yes. Dont even ask me how many coffees I have in a day.. Am I getting any work done? The remarkable answer is YES I AM. Almost everyone I know warned me against the home office thing. But I honestly think its the perfect marriage for me. I do get my work done, and I feel fantastic not having too get power-dressed and not having to sit in a horrible office landscape drinking nescafe. 12 points to home office. I think Ill hoover the living room now before I reply to my emails.